I noticed that as & when she gets opportunity to talk, she looks towards me with a real attractive, inviting smile & same time pressure with the side ...ody, as we were sitting still close. Her sister of 17 years was taking care of all requirements of her k**. After some time, all wantedTo take rest, so we raised the middle berth too. Still some berths were vacant in the neighboring coup. Her mother & aunt went there to sleep. I lied again on lower berth. The lady, sapana, her name changed, went. As for Lisa, we had a story set up that Mike came home early, and came to our place to pick up Laura and surprise her. He came into our house when no one answered the doorbell (no one heard it over the other noises going on!), heard Laura and me fucking loudly, and peeked in the bedroom to see what was happening. Then he looked around the other bedrooms and found Lisa blindfolded, tied up and helpless on our bed, and decided that fair exchange was no robbery.We entered the room where Lisa was. The judge was upset. That was a matter between the people there, the FBI and the judge. The courts - by doing the inventory - had technically taken possession of the equipment and someone had stolen federal property.What mattered to us was it was not there now, therefore doubt was thrown over the complete inventory status.I doubted that equipment located in foreign countries and under use for contract obligations and the safety of field personnel had been compromised. But we could challenge. I am a closed book. So if that's the problem, the obvious solution is let myself open up. To get beyond the simple expedient of being 'the boyfriend' and allowing them to see the real me, which is terrifying to contemplate.Why was that such a scary thought? Fear of rejection? Well, I should be used to that by now. Except, I always took comfort in the idea that they weren't really rejecting me, because they didn't really know the 'real' me. They were rejecting my version of 'the boyfriend'.I was.
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